Tag: poetry

Grief is unpredictable, it is wild
Walking down the narrow pathway between the walls of the canyon, closing me in on each side. It is dark, so dark. Only a little light breaks down the darkness between the canyon walls, filtering down from the partial moon far a above. The wind blows shifts of clouds across the splinter of the moon, making the darkness even more prounced as it shifts and waves deep down in the canyon.
But I can’t feel the wind here, enclosed by walls. Not even a breeze. I do not know if that is good or bad. I miss the wind’s soft caress touching my face like a beloved’s hand of comfort. And I miss the howling violence of the wind that seems to scream out my pain, makes me feel like I am tossed in turbulent waves. Just like my heart feels right now. When I can’t scream, the wind screams for me. When I can’t feel God, the wind brings him close, like the feel of a loving hand on my face.
But then, the wind can also wildly attack like the grief I am fealing right now, tossing and turning me in its power till I cannot take it anymore. So maybe it is better that right here deep down in the canyon I cannot feel the wind, only see its effect in the flittering light of the moon.
Deeper and deeper I go, following the desire to find a place to hide, out of sight. A little hole to curl up in till the grief in me dies down once more.
And in the silence I will notice the flower growing. Tiny and wispy, but oh so strong. With a warm yellow color that glows in the dark. Warm and comforting like the wind’s soft touch on my cheek. It grows and blooms but stays just small. One tiny flower in all the darkness. It glows and warms my heart. It speaks without saying a word. It speaks of hope. Tiny, soft, far away hope. A hope for eternity. I watch it glow and sit with it. Quitly letting its glow seep into my heart, let its glimmer fill it out and let it quiet my mind. Because just that glimmer of hope is enough.
I do not pick that tiny flower. Its gentle glow would fade up in the daylight. I will leave it and carry its glow in my heart back up through the canyon walls. Some precious things only live in the darkness of pain.
Because just knowing that this tiny flower deep down in the darkness of the canyon continues to shimmer gives me sustance to face the reality of the grief once more.